So my first time smoking weed was an experience I am yet to forget ( my first time smoking HASH was also another experience, watch me dropping that article soon). I smoke regularly now and everything is good but my first time was far from that. So it’s my first year of University and that night there was an organised event for students (1st, 2nd and 3rd year) and lecturers to get networking and talking. So during freshers I made a friend whose still my best bitch till this day. This girl is also arab so we clicked instantly and she also does not fit the arab societal standard (So it was a great match) She was and still is a huge stoner, so obviously she offered that I join her for a smoke before the event. I say yes, because who am I to miss out on this opportunity? I had smoked with her maybe twice before this but I never got that high because I didn’t take too much. So her, I and a couple of others smoke up ( I don’t remember how much we smoked)
We finish our last joint and I am fucked, I didn’t know yet. We start walking to the venue which is a 20 min walk (Too long for a high person) The journey seemed like it lasted forever, I kept falling behind the group we were walking with but I couldn’t care less. I think I was wearing boot heels or sth which was a bad decison. During the journey, the paranoia kicks in ” Everyone knows I am high, fuck” which are normal thoughts tbh.
We arrive there and a bunch of our classmates are already there. we say hi to everyone and move along. At this point the High kicked in even more and I was the highest I have ever been. I was so in my head, I just wanted to sit down, I couldn’t socialise or interact with anyone because I was so fucked. I wasn’t forming proper sentences, kept losing my train of thought and you’d randomly catch me staring into nothing. At one point we were stood in a group with our COURSE LEADER, I was stood 2 people down from her so I was in her direct eye-line. She kept looking at me and kept looking, so I get even more paranoid. I didn’t answer anything she was asking us and maybe thats why she gave me weird looks. As she was nodding to what the girl next to her was saying, she was just looking at me with the most concerned face ever. I try to get out of my head, it just keeps saying ” everyone fucking knows your high, including your lecturer now” I get out of the circle as soon as I can and I just complain to my friend. I am telling her how paranoid and fucked up I am, bless her she tried to calm me down but it fails.
As I was going to the bathroom, a guy in my course stops me (I have spoken to this guy maybe once or twice briefly) he put his hand on my arms and in a concerned way says ” Are you okay? Are you drunk? how many drinks have you had” where I proceeded to laugh nervously and say ” what? no! I didn’t even have a drink” (which is true I was too fucked to go to the bar) and obviously I cannot say I am high because how dare anybody know. I get out the situation asap and I see theres an abandoned sofa in-front of the projector screen where there was NO ONE there. So I rush there quickly to sit down and gather myself. I am finally content, I am alone and down have to worry. every now and then I would take a glimpse round and ALWAYS catch eyes with that same lecturer from earlier, who is still giving me weird looks. Not 15 minutes after, a bunch of people start coming to where I am. thankfully my friends sit on the sofa I am on but then everyone in the gathering starts coming to this place because guess what? that projector had a reason we were about to watch sth.
I don’t remember what we watched or what happened. All I remember is asking to leave as soon as it was done. thankfully that happened, after an awkward goodbye with the lecturers and others, we left
I think we went to a bar after that? don’t even ask me I have no fucking clue how I ended up in bed that day. Conclusion: never smoke for the first time during a social event x
Lots of Love from
Not Your Arab Girl x